Learning to accept changes in our physical and cognitive abilities can be very difficult as we get older – and it’s not uncommon to avoid having those uncomfortable conversations with ourselves about what we need to do to mitigate the effects of the natural ageing process and keep ourselves safe, secure, happy and healthy.
For those of you currently looking after elderly parents, there may well come a time when you’re unable to provide the appropriate level of care and when you need to source external support, whether that’s in the form of a private nurse, a live-in carer or something else.
Of course, you need to make sure that you involve your parents in the conversation wherever possible so that they don’t feel as though you’re stripping them of their agency… but, again, it can be very difficult to broach these topics and you may find that your parents are resistant, particularly in the beginning.
To help you navigate this next stage in life, here are some suggestions from the Concept Care team that could prove useful. As ever, if you need any further guidance or advice, give us a call today.
1. Highlight the benefits of care
Detailing the many benefits of private care can help your parents see that it’s a good step forward, rather than anything negative.
Explain, for example, how it means that they could age in place and live independently for longer in their own home, that they’ll likely feel safer and more secure, that they’ll have help with personal care, household chores and so on, and that they’ll feel less isolated and lonely thanks to more friendly interactions over time.
2. Include them in decisions
Don’t just decide what’s happening and then tell your parents what they can expect. Empower them by choosing carers together and discussing the level of care they’d like, then start off by introducing support measures slowly so they can adjust as time goes on.
It’s likely that they’ll start to feel the benefits quickly and be more positive about the thought of accepting more help later on.
3. Consider a trial run
If your parents are really finding the idea of private care tricky to accept, perhaps suggest they give it a trial run to see how they feel, rather than committing to something immediately. Again, this can help them see how it all works, whether they like it and whether they can see the value in it.
4. Be prepared to follow up
Aim to have your conversations about care with your parents in person rather than over the phone – and it’s possible that you’ll have to have the same or similar chat a couple of times before any agreements are reached.
Don’t be deterred if your parents turn down the idea entirely at first. Persevere, talk to them about their worries and concerns, and slowly you’ll be able to provide them with the reassurance they need to be more accepting of help.
